Recettes Secrètes: Apple Bitters

Top of my wish list this year is (once again, ah hem Santa) Brad Thomas Parsons' omnibus Bitters: A Spirited History of a Classic Cure-All, with Cocktails, Recipes, and Formulas. Luckily I was able to score this recipe last year even without the book and whipped up a batch of consumable giftage gold. Trust me, your whiskey drinking friends will thank you later.

Apple Bitters
by Brad Thomas Parsons

Peels from 6 medium to large (preferably organic) apples
Zest of half a lemon, cut into strips
2 Cinnamon sticks
1/2 tsp allspice berries
1/4 tsp coriander seeds
1/2 tsp cassia chips
1/2 tsp cinchona bark*
4 cloves
2 cups high-proof bourbon
1 cup water
2 tbsp rich simple syrup (two parts sugar, one part water)

Place all of the ingredients except for the bourbon, water, and rich syrup in a quart-sized Mason jar or other large glass container with a lid. Pour in the 2 cups of bourbon, adding more if necessary so that all the ingredients are covered. Seal the jar and store at room temperature out of direct sunlight for 2 weeks, shaking the jar once a day.

After 2 weeks, strain the liquid through a cheesecloth-lined funnel into a clean quart-sized jar to remove the solids. Repeat until all of the sediment has been filtered out. Squeeze the cheesecloth over the jar to release any excess liquid and transfer the solids to a small saucepan. Cover the jar and set aside.

Cover the solids in the saucepan with the water and bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Cover the saucepan, lower the heat, and simmer for 10 minutes.

Remove the saucepan from the heat and let cool completely. Once cooled, add the contents of the saucepan (both liquid and solids) to another quart-sized Mason jar. Cover the jar and store at room temperature out of direct sunlight for 1 week, shaking the jar daily.

After 1 week, strain the jar with the liquid and solids through a cheesecloth-lined funnel into a clean quart-sized Mason jar. Repeat until all of the sediment has been filtered out. Discard the solids. Add this liquid to the jar containing the original bourbon solution.

Add the rich syrup to the jar and stir to incorporate, then cover and shake to fully dissolve the syrup.

Allow the mixture to stand at room temperature for 3 days. At the end of the 3 days, skim off any debris that floats to the surface and pour the mixture through a cheesecloth-lined funnel one last time to remove any solids.

Using a funnel, decant the bitters into smaller jars and label. If there’s any sediment left in the bottles, or if the liquid is cloudy, give the bottle a shake before using. The bitters will last indefinitely, but for optimum flavor use within a year.

*Can be ordered online through Tenzing Momo. Another great use for cinchona bark? Jeffrey Morgenthaler's Homemade Tonic Water.

Buvare: Sidedish

Thanksgiving and cocktail are seldom synonymous words. The holiday is one for wine, and plenty of it. But on the current episode of The Table Set we challenged ourselves to think outside of the wine box and come up with food friendly alternatives to unoaked Chardonnay and Pinot Noir.
While craft beer and hard cider make great cases for themselves, I decided to also come up with a pre-dinner cocktail. As I would be spending the holiday in the Russian River Valley this year, miles from Iron Horse and Korbel, I considered a sparkling wine element, but instead dusted off a bottle of Korbel brandy as the base spirit.
A longtime fan of a Brandy Sidecar, I tinkered with the classic ratio, introducing fresh cranberry syrup and black walnut bitters, with Dry Curacao in for the orange liqueur. The result is a lively holiday drink that can last through the season, Turkey Day 'til New Year's Eve.

Listen to The Table Set: Not Talking Turkey

Buvare: Sweater Weather

They say the most dangerous food is wedding cake.
I imagine that trickles down to what's in the toasting glass... So when two of my loveliest friends recently asked me to concoct their wedding reception's signature cocktail I may have broken a small sweat whilst smiling and saying "of course!"
This would just have to be my most perfect cocktail yet.

Not one to take such challenges lightly, I drew up a lengthy survey. I would need to know every detail of the bride & groom's tastes, their vision for the wedding, guest makeup, and --most importantly-- if they like a sweet drank.
After diagramming their answers I hosted a very serious cocktail tasting consultation. A wall of jarred syrups and infusions initially separated us, but after a couple of autumnal trial rounds (November wedding = best cocktail season ever), we all loosened up and began to make some headway. The two couldn't have more disparate tastes, but factoring in a diverse group, we all agreed on vodka. I cloaked it with harvest flavors and textures, resulting in what the clever bride (and one-time ChocoMeat guest writer) christened "Sweater Weather."

Important lessons were learned on the big day (i.e. insist on specifics when a caterer is handling the shopping), but all-in-all the cocktail was well received by the party. In fact, some people forewent the wine and drank it all night.
I suppose I can file that under success.

Sweater Weather

1 1/2 oz Tito's vodka
1 oz apricot liqueur
1 oz natural unfiltered apple juice
1/2 oz cinnamon simple syrup
1 1/2 oz Reed's ginger beer

Combine all ingredients except ginger beer and shake well. Strain over fresh ice into a bucket glass. Top with ginger beer and lightly stir. Express oils from an orange peel and garnish, top with freshly-grated nutmeg.

To make cinnamon simple syrup, combine 1 cup of water with 1 cup of sugar and several cinnamon sticks in a medium saucepan. Bring to a simmer over medium heat, stirring frequently until sugar has dissolved. Remove from heat and cool completely. Strain and bottle. Keeps in the refrigerator for up to a month.

Dining with Doug and Karen

A few months back, my Table Set co-host Andy Windak was invited to join TJ Miller as guest chef on the Nerdist podcast Dining with Doug and Karen. They were so impressed with Andy's whimsical and heartfelt spread that they invited him back for another round. And this time, Andy asked me to join him and create a beverage program to be paired with his Breakfast for Dinner menu.

The guest co-host on our episode was Tim Heidecker of Tim & Eric fame and most recently his film The Comedy, making the total three wisecracking comedy folk to please.
No pressure.

We were given Meltdown Comics' green room to stage, where I set up a makeshift bar (which seemed to elicit excitement from the podcast's cocktail-loving producer).

I was most excited to serve the first drink, a shot to be served alongside Andy's amuse bouche. It was the first idea I experimented with once I knew the theme was breakfast, elevated: A Bloodless Mary. The concept is pretty simple, really: Infuse the spirit with tomato rather than clog the glass with thick juice. I picked cherry tomatoes from my garden and steeped them in gin for a week. The resulting liquor was golden and heady with a sun-kissed tomato cologne, bright and familiar on the palate with a lasting umami quality. I mixed the gin with lemon juice, bacon bitters, a dash of Crystal hot sauce, black pepper and celery salt, then served in frosty lemon-pepper ice shot glasses. Instant breakfast party!

Andy's amuse was a delicious Benedict Bite of homemade English muffin, fried speck, poached quail egg, and scratch hollandaise.

For round two I knew Andy was injecting some Latin love, so I mixed up a Dirty Horchata cocktail. Here I infused smoky Mezcal with Stumptown Guatemalan coffee beans, shaken with horchata and cocoa mole bitters until frothy, garnished with freshly shaved cinnamon.

The horchata was served alongside Andy's Chicken & "Waffles" -or- Coq Au Vin Chilaquiles, a composition of duck-fat-fried corn chips, braised chicken, salsa, queso fresco, cilantro, and a waffle fried egg.

What breakfast menu would be complete without the iconic Mimosa? For a seasonal twist I used dry French brut hard sparkling apple cider in place of bubbly. For the juice element I froze popsicles of fresh orange and brown sugar with a rosemary sprig "stick." The brut cider nibbled away at the ice pops slowly releasing and blending the flavors.

The corresponding course was Andy's fish course. He served Shrimp and Grits Poutine - Fish fumet gravy, butter-poached shrimp, grits "waffle fries," and bacon fat rouille.

For dessert I went with a coffee-replacing Breakfast Beer. Mikkeller Beer Geek Breakfast (oatmeal stout brewed with coffee) enhanced lightly with Amontillado and Pedro Jiminez Sherry, garnished with a Stumptown coffee bean and freshly grated nutmeg.
Andy matched the robustness with his Hallowaffle - A pumpkin waffle, Count Chocula ice cream, maple bourbon syrup, chocolate whipped cream, and maple bacon crumble. As a bonus round he also brought out Booberry and Frankenberry ice creams. Nuts!

Overall I think our creativity was appreciated, though pushing the envelope always results in a few confounding reactions. Listen for yourself and imagine what it all must taste like while listening to other people sip, chew and slurp. (*wink*)

Listen to our episode of Dining with Doug and Karen


Photos by Ted Houser

Buvare: Dark and Stormy Night

Halloween! Not only my favorite holiday, but increasingly my favorite time of year to concoct potent potables, with a decidedly sinister edge. Last year's Witching Hour cocktail was brainy and elegant, but this year for our annual Table Set Halloween podcast I decided to brew something more approachable and thirst-quenching.

The Dark and Stormy is one of the simplest and most delightful cocktails, period. For my adaptation I introduced The Kraken, a black spiced rum of epic proportions, a spicy Jamaican ginger brew and several additional autumnal highlights. Leaving out the eye of newt, this time...

Listen to The Table Set: Dark and Stormy Night

Last year with the glut of pumpkin bourbon I infused for the Witching Hour, I made this impromptu punch for my friends. It was consumed within minutes. Highly recommended for your own gathering of ghouls, named for the Halloween party held in The Legend of Sleepy Hollow before Ichabod Crane's infamous ride home. Beware!

Gala Parfait: Tiki Party

Tiki has become something special to me over the years.
It is not just a kitschy party theme, type of cloyingly sweet drank, or dive bar category. Bizarrely enough it's filed alongside heavyweights like Christmas and New Year's as an important family tradition. Yes, my parents, sister and I do Tiki. And if I do say so myself, we do it damn well.

Initially, the end of summer Tiki Party at my parents' home in Tucson was a heavily-anticipated annual celebration. A break from large family gatherings brimming with kids ("we love your keikis, but this one is for adults"), and the rare party to really have a focus on drinking. Since I was college-aged when the Tiki Party debuted, I was not only surprised by this, but fully on board! Each year seemed to one-up the prior, adding a pit-roasted whole pig, ukelele orchestra, and even tradition hula dancers in full garb. It was a fantastic tradition.

Then one year the invite never went out. Then another year. The masses were restless, when would there be another Tiki Party? I tried to sate myself in California with regular visits to Tiki Ti, Tonga Room, Trader Sam's and with a big fat Tiki episode on my podcast The Table Set, but it wasn't enough. Once I found out my sister Megan missed it as much as me we conspired to convince my parents by any means necessary to bring it back.

Then this year... we finally succeeded.

It's always a whirlwind driving home to Arizona and jumping in to the preparations. It's also always startling opening the fridge in the garage to see Laura Palmer as a pig, awaiting the sacrificial pyre.

Day of, first thing's first - Get that pig going. It takes all afternoon to get a proper tender slow-cooked Kalua-style pig.

The photo opp murals Megan painted are always a hit.

And while the tables are set, I have my hands full with another task.

Shocking, I know - I manage the bar. With the addition of the bamboo tiki hut-style bar this year, things got serious.

Selecting a menu is hardly an easy task. Each year we debate, recounting drink popularity from the previous parties. The true Mai Tai is our collective favorite, but seems to be too boozy for our guests, as we always have the most leftover of it. The Blue Hawaiian is garish, but always a winner. We pre-mix everything in large batches as well, so the recipe has to work in that format - and some ingredients, such as bitters, intensify over time. This year I decided to select all new drinks; Classics that cover very different flavor profiles as well as liquor variety. No need to be rum snobs - It's just not for everybody.

In lieu of the signature Mai Tai I went out on a limb with South Pacific Punch, a potent blend of dark and light rums, fresh orange and lime juices, Falernum and passion fruit syrup. Not for the faint of heart, I think the profile of the spicy Falernum is what set this drink apart.

To satisfy the sweet drink lovers, instead of a neon blue concoction (I just can't get down with Blue Curaçao) I opted for the popular Chi Chi, a vodka-based riff on the Piña Colada with coconut cream, pineapple juice and a dust of nutmeg. Sometimes simplicity is best.

For the first time we introduced a bourbon-based tiki drink, which turned out to be the crowd favorite, the ominous-sounding Polynesian Paralysis. Akin to a Hawaiian-style Mai Tai, this one blends pineapple and citrus juices with orgeat, which marry nicely with the bourbon for a dangerously smooth sipper.

We always try to think of creative ways to keep designated drivers and non-drinkers in on the fun, and this year hibiscus lemonade and tropical iced tea just wasn't going to cut it, so I whipped up a non-alcoholic tiki classic Rainbow Punch. Here pineapple, orange, and lime juices are blended with grenadine, soda, and bitters for a well-disguised virgin.

It was an exhausting night of shaking drinks, so I was happy to have some relief long enough to get in on the Kalua pig and Polynesian potluck before it was all gone.

Perlana, one of the "best dressed" winners enjoys a Chi Chi.

Yes, no matter how much math and careful planning goes into our batch drink making, we always over-do it and have SO much leftover. Not a huge complaint, but it suffices to say that Tiki Party turns into Tucson Tiki WEEK. Aw well, maybe we'll get it right next year... Oh yes, there will be a next year.

Recettes Secrètes: Peychaud's Bitters Ice Cream

Friends, note: I keep my promises.

On a recent episode of The Table Set, I divulged my obsession with creating an aromatic bitters ice cream. Peychaud's Bitters, to be exact.
These magical Creole bitters are sweet, floral and fruity; the classic invisible touch in a true New Orleans Sazerac. In ice cream, they add a pretty pink hue - Fitting for this grown-up bittersweet bubblegum confection.
Thinking I was on to something pretty brilliant, I then read in the LA Times that Giovanni Martinez of Sadie LA also created a Peychaud's ice cream that he floats in Pellegrino Sanbitter soda. Touché, good sir. But I say up the ante. Sanbitter is essentially a virgin Campari n' soda, let's call a spade a spade, shall we?
I digress. Back to promises. And a perfect nightcap, in or out of your cocktail.

Peychaud's Bitters Ice Cream

2 cups heavy cream
1 cup whole milk
2/3 cup sugar
1/4 cup Peychaud's Bitters

If using an automatic ice cream maker, make sure bowl is completely frozen before starting. Whisk the chilled milk and cream with sugar until completely dissolved. Stir in the bitters. Pour mixture into ice cream maker and follow the manufacturer's instructions (should churn for about 25 minutes). Cure in freezer for at least two hours or overnight before serving.

For more classic ice cream social excitement...

Listen to The Table Set: Party Like It's 1899